Backyard to the Universe
Small Group Ministries
Inherent Worth and Dignity
AFFIRMATION: The inherent worth and dignity of every person. Everyone is important.
Opening Words/Lighting the candle/chalice
I'm unique and unrepeatable. I’m glad to be me.
You're unique and unrepeatable. I’m glad that you’re you.
We're unique and unrepeatable. I’m glad that we’re us.
From the song, “I’m Unique and Unrepeatable” found in We Believe and Around the Church, Around the Year. The original source is unknown.
Check-in: How are things going for you today?
Topic/Activity: Select the stories about Emerson and Thoreau, or IALAC, as there may not be time to do both.
The story is a composite of stories taken from the Unitarian Universalist Alphabet.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON and HENRY DAVID THOREAU
Mr. Emerson was a Unitarian minister. Eight of his ancestors, like his father and grandfather and great-grandfather were ministers. He was expected to be one, too. But he didn’t like being a minister, so changed to being a writer and speaker instead. He wrote and spoke about many of his ideas. He wanted everyone to develop their own ideas and beliefs. He wanted to spread kindness and joy, and to make people feel better and think more. He was upset that people owned other people, called slaves.
Mr. Emerson was over six feet tall. He stood very straight. He had a deep voice. When he was around, people felt good about themselves. A woman who washed clothes for people came to hear him speak. She didn’t really understand what he was saying, but she loved to see him standing before the group making everyone think that they were as good as he was, just by the way he talked!
Mr. Emerson loved children. A child could always go into the room where he was writing. He kept paper, pencils and scissors for them-and something to eat. He liked to have fun with children and enjoyed picnics. He had four children of his own.
One day he was planning a picnic with his children. They invited children of all ages-and some adults, too-who enjoyed having fun and liked being together. There was a huckleberrying party, when everyone went hunting for berries, possibly to make pies. This party was to be led by Henry David Thoreau, because he knew where all the berries were!
The day of the picnic was sunny. Everyone was finding lots of berries. Suddenly Edward Emerson, who was about four years old, tripped and fell. He was carrying a big basket of berries. They went all over the place and got dirty and squished. Edward started to cry. People tried to give him some of their berries, but he still cried. Mr. Thoreau came over to see why Edward was crying. He put his arm around Edward.
“Edward,” Mr. Thoreau said, “if huckleberries are to continue to grow, some have to be scattered to start new plants.” Mr. Thoreau said that he thought that nature needed to have little children sometimes stumble and scatter the berries. “There will be a lot of berries here someday, and we shall owe them all to you!” Mr. Thoreau said.
Edward began to smile again.
Numerous other children’s stories address this principle, including “traditional” stories:
“The Ugly Duckling,” by Hans Christian Andersen
“The Little Engine That Could”
“Rudolph, the Red Nose Reindeer”
Are there other stories that affirm a person’s ability?
I Am Lovable and Capable (IALAC), based on the story by Sidney Simon (1973). Have a big IALAC sign. Read the following story. When something negative occurs, have a participant tear a piece from the sign. When positive, tape a piece onto the sign.
When I got up this morning, my son reminded me that he needed cookies for school—and the bus was due in a half hour!
Well, I got breakfast for my daughter, the same cereal that she has been requesting for the last three months, and she said I never give her any variety!
As I got ready for work, I found that I had forgotten to return a call last evening. It made me feel so inadequate about juggling things.
My boss disagreed with the presentation I had been working on for a week, but didn’t have any helpful suggestions.
I got home just as the children got home from school. These afternoon hugs are so great. But my son didn’t want to talk with me: he just wanted to play with a friend. My daughter stopped to ask me about my day, but really didn’t hear me when I said that it hadn’t been all that great.
Supper was really a pleasant time. We got into a discussion and really listened to each other.
Bedtime was a fight, as my daughter was still doing her homework and said that it was my fault because I made her do some chores and took away from homework time. Things always seem to be blamed on me.
How does the IALAC sign look at the end of the story? Share comments on the activity.
How do apply this of inherent worth and dignity principle to other people?
Does it apply to everyone? If not, to whom does it apply? And how do we relate to the people to whom it does not apply?
What is the origin or source of our worth and dignity? Is it something that we get from others? Do we "give" it to others? If we do not give or receive worth and dignity from others, what is the source?
How does respect for the worth and dignity of another person correlate with anger and frustration with a person's actions? What happens to a sense of worth and dignity when there is need for confrontation? (The concept of Tough Love may come up here.) Or, how do we disagree-confront- and maintain our own dignity and that of the child?
Closing Words:
Everyone is important.
Have you noticed how posture reflects how we feel about ourselves? When we feel good about ourselves, we sit or stand straight, or erect, like Mr. Emerson.
When we are tired or upset, our shoulders sag, as if we were trying to fold into ourselves and become invisible.
Feel what I mean. Let your shoulders sag, and slump in the chair. Try to take a deep breath that way. It works better if we are sitting up straight, as if we own the world! Sit as if you are being pulled up to the ceiling. Breathe deeply, and let the breath go. There, that feels good! And what makes a difference? Knowing that we are each a being of worth and dignity, of truth and meaning, of justice and compassion, and that we are accepted for who we are. Helen Zidowecki
Likes and wishes: How was this session for you?
Zidowecki, January 2006